Sometimes I think the “normal” people are just people you don’t know well enough yet. We talked about relationships with parents, and how many girls have “daddy issues.” I don’t have dad issues. My parents married at a young age, and have a successful marriage. However, neither Jessie or I would have talked about this stuff so soon without having the therapist as a soundboard. I spent five years seeing a therapist, so this isn’t strange to me.
As his relationship patterns are the opposite of mine, a part of me fears that if we were to really date, one of us might wind up getting hurt. We also have a tight group of friends, and I think we are both afraid to compromise that. In my work and other aspects of life, I am uncomfortable with comfortable. We both teach Wednesday nights, so we went out to dinner after class to the Fat Raddish. When we set the date for this project, I didn’t realize it was actually the first day of spring. Anyway, dinner tonight was pretty normal, not unlike other times we’ve hung out and had dinner. We talked about our families more than we ever did before. It was refreshing to hear this since I didn’t grow up with a lot of money, either. Earlier in the day I sent a little note to Jessie by messenger. But I do save money, while I think she lives off her salary more. I get uncomfortable talking about what could happen in the next 40 days.But when it comes to relationships, I do seek secure relationships that are clearly defined. Jessie brought me a little care package of stuff to jokingly get me through the next 40 days. I wanted to honor our project together with something lighthearted. I’m not worried about the unknown, but about us falling into our usual roles, and how we deal with that.I know I should relax and open myself up to vulnerability, so I can learn to enjoy dating more in the future. Tim insisted on being a gentleman and paying for dinner, which was very sweet of him, but I want to get the next one. How do you feel about this relationship/project right now? I know I don’t have as much savings as he does, but I’ve always supported myself financially, and I don’t mind spending on great experiences. How do you feel about this relationship/project right now? The play is about a bunch of college students going to parties, getting drunk, having sex, and their complicated interpersonal relationships. It seems to me his dating style could result from this. They have the best roasted carrots, and my favorite tequila jalapeño drink. Before the date, Tim had a messenger deliver a cute note: “Me + You x 40. He told me that when his mother got pregnant, his father made her choose between keeping the child or staying with him.
We had our first date at The Fat Radish in the Lower East Side. However, I know that when an opportunity scares me, I must go for it. No matter what the outcome, it will certainly be an interesting experience. There is always one girl he’s really excited about that he’s trying to go out with, a second girl he’s been seeing for a few weeks and is getting tired of, and a third girl he’s been seeing a while and is getting ready to break up with. We discussed Tim’s relationship patterns, and how he’s in a constant cycle between three women.He breaks off relationships before they get too serious to avoid the risk of abandonment.He’s built up this reputation for himself as “the player,” but I see past the façade.He’s been a great friend, and I know he’s a very kind person.We all have our issues and cope with life differently.